Furries are a kink, a community, an internet subculture almost as old as the internet itself, or so it seems. They are also one of the subcultures to break into mainstream media, with portrayals in many TV shows, and articles in mainstream press. These, they claim, until recent years provided a bias and unrealistic image of the furry and the lifestyle.

Furries in the media

My personal experience of furries has been varied, they are just normal people, and so can either be awful to be around, or perfectly fine. But this isn’t the way many view them, with a focus more on the kinky sex and anthropomorphic porn (yiff) side than anything else. Whilst many furries do engage with this aspect, there is much more besides.

Example of Yiff artwork.

The furry I spoke to, whilst he has admitted to being attracted to yiff, also reports a strong spiritual connection to the subculture and his fursona. For those wondering, a fursona is the adopted human/animal hybrid of the furry, not to be confused with a therian, who feels a connection to the animal and less to the hybrid. Many fursuits are representations of the individuals fursona.

Example of a fursuit

What follows is part 1 of the ongoing conversation between myself and a mid 20s, male furry currently married to a non furry. Whilst I have taken every effort not to edit his replies, on occasion poor grammar and spelling have necessitated me to provide a translation of what he meant.

Me:Do you have a fursona? If so, how did you come to choose this one?

Wolfenstein:I do have a fursona. It’s [removed]. He’s dirty white wolf with black out tips on his ears and tail. His eyes are almost neon green.
How did I choose this?? I just know thats who I am. Well actually I’m a lifestyler. I wear a collar everyday. I work and live as wolf ( as much as society will allow example: I don’t walk on all fours in Walmart lol). My new wife and gf of 8 years knows and accepts me. She knows that inside I do not connect to the human race. But more to the animal kingdom. ( I may have forgot to mention I’m therian as well. Hence the length of my connection to the fandom).

Me:How do you live your life as a wolf? Why do you feel you connect more to the animal kingdom over the human race?

Wolfenstein:Well I guess the biggest thing is that from the time I was a pup I could always interact with dogs and cats like on another level. Dogs mostly. I thought it was normal until I was a bit older and my fams [family] started talking about how odd it was. And with my k9s [canines]. ( I have a german shep and a real wolf living with me ) I can talk and communicate with them to the point where my wife wishes that her and I could communicate that well. Like they will stare at her and she asks me what they want and I can tell. – trust me explaining this sounds as crazy to me as it does to you-

As far as living as wolf. Like I said I do what makes me comfortable. Like I know some couples will cuddle after sex or Just laying around. Me I like to be petted. And my back scratched. And as far as laying if me and my wife are watching TV I’m usually in the floor curled up with the k9s. Like laying on them and vice versa. When I go hunting. I do it not like humans should. (Example squirrel hunting this year was the first time I follows my instincts and I had taken my wife ). Usually you move slow and wait. This year I took a pistol and when I seen a squirrel I gave chase when I closed in I of course used the pistol. But it was so real!! I had brought it back to the wife in my teeth lol. Paw to god!

Me:Is your wife a furry? If not, how did she and others react when you told them? How long ago did you adopt this lifestyle?

Wolfenstein:
* sighs * no she’s not. And between you and me its hard for me. I mean I love her to no end. But there’s like a barrier that is there. I don’t blame her at all she has been nothing but supportive of me. I mean she has taken some wild changes. Like it was nothing. But there is still something there. Some connection that I just can’t make with herI have been a closet furry. Hell for prob 11+ years. But I finally admitted it to my self about a year ago. The fam and friends that I have told have been very cool. Either they are supporting or they just don’t care. Lol.

Me:Have you made the connection with anyone else? Human or animal? What leads you to think you were a closet furry?

Wolfenstein:Well I mean I made a connection with another furry my wife is aware that I have an online mate. I don’t think she understands the need of the connection. I also had a strong connection. To one dog. She was my best friend. Like. She would have died for my and I for her. She was hit by a car. And all I could do is lay down and hold her till she passed away.

Sorry. Anyway. I think I was a furry for a long time. It’s little things that me and my fams remember from time to time. (Btw most of my fam do not know about my lifestyle.) Things like for every Halloween I wanted a tail. Like power ranger and a tail. Umm a pirate with a tail etc… And when I was young I’d go to my cousins she was old enough to play with her makeup so being younger than her if let her make me up but only if I had whiskers. (Dude I’m talking like 5 and 6 years old lol) like I said there’s so many tiny things and comments made about my past that now just click.

Me:With your online mate, what is the connection there? What is that relationship like? What was your childhood like?

Wolfenstein:Ohh man. I have a certain love for my online mate that can’t be described  Mind you my wife is my life. I would die for her and I think it’s only because of that connection that I and my online mate have that makes it so special with out that we would only be friends.

The relationship is like any other we talk about our day. What’s going on in each others life’s. offer any advice we can. And show we care for one another. We also rp [roleplay] and connect as wolfs. – I’m sorry it’s really hard to explain the feeling.-

My childhood. Was normal I guess I went to school, came home played with friends on the weekends, had parents in my life. Soft when they wanted, Stern when they needed, I mean really it was American pie lol. I was the first born had anything I wanted ( within reason ) was taught how to work for my allowance. And how to respect ones elders. But there was always something. Different something wrong…… It was like watching TV. Only the TV was your life. Like I was watching them learning them mimicking and blending. Never really being me

Me:
When were you first exposed to the idea of being a furry? Obviously you’ve said you thought something was different for many years, but how quickly did you become a furry once you knew what it was, if that makes sense?

Wolfenstein:Well I guess like many furrys [sic] ( even if they deny it ) I found out via sexual artwork. And that’s another deal. I will gladly talk about but first to answer your question. Once I found the naughty side of furrydom I was interested in alot of ways. After I came to an understanding about the way I felt I just accepted it. I did some research outside of the dirty side an as i read i felt… found. And at home for the first time. I have a hard time expressing my self in verbal words do I wrote my wife (gf at the time) and email. I sat and watched her read it.

Me:Could you talk about the sexual artwork a little? What sort of images were the ones that actually interested you? Did they relate to your fursona? What other aspects of the culture did you find?

Wolfenstein:Well sure but I’d like to ask you to try to understand something. As I grew up I was all ways with my friends. But I felt excluded when we got to talking about girls. They would be like “ohh blah blah is so freaking sexy ” I would chime in and agree but it was not how I felt. Now don’t get me wrong I seen a certain attraction to the female body but these guys when on and on over it and I didn’t feel the same. For a few months I thought I might be gay but as I started to really look at the male form I was quickly reassured I was not gay lol. So then I thought maybe I just don’t think like that. Or maybe this is as horny as anyone gets and they are just blowing it up to act big. I was wrong.

The first time I seen a yiff pic…. I was instantly turned on like I had never been before. It’s was (still is) the attraction that I assume that my friends felt back in the day looking at what’s her name.

I feel in love with the yiff side of furrydom. I’ve heard of furrys only being attracted to their species. I find almost all females attractive.

I found out about the cons and the help sites like ep and fur affinity furry for life. And ways to define my feelings.

Example of Yiff artwork.

 

Another example of Yiff artwork.

Me:Were there any other differences you noticed growing up? Do you think if you had never seen any yiff pictures or anything about the furry fandom you would have came to the identity you have now?

Wolfenstein:I used to bite a lot. They said I’m ADHD. That biting was a reflex but now it makes me wonder. If it was something more. And my parents said I would growl in my sleep. ( I do now but it’s voluntary.).

No I believe had I not found out about the fandom…… I don’t know if I’d be alive…… I mean before I was a shell. A vessel in which I had stolen everyone else’s identity. Mixed into one. Able to evolve into any situation. I was a very good people person. I could always make friends but it wasn’t real. And inside I was dead. Like I had never really been born. Once I accepted it and said this is who you are. I changed. Like as if something used a defibrillator on me. I instantly stopped judging people for who they were and what they did. For the first time in 26 years. I was happy with me. And being me. Had I not clicked on that pic. I would probably. Have killed myself sometime before now

Me:So prior to joining the fandom would you say you were depressed? Could you talk me through how you felt back then a bit more.

Wolfenstein:Back then I always had a group of friends around. I was the hug [life?] of the party blah blah blah but you know when someone kills them self and everyone’s just blown away cause they were always so full of life….. I knew. I knew that their full of life was just a mask. Because I wore it too. Make every one laugh. Maybe some of there happiness with spill over onto you kinda crap! As far as me being alone. I would just feel wrong.

It’s hard for me to go back I was a dark asshole back then I guess I had to spread my misery. So in the most comical of ways cause you can’t loose friends they are what’s making you seem normal. I would pick an tease and prod at one or more of the group.

Me:If I’m understanding this correctly, would you say you had a fairly nice childhood, albeit one where you would want a tail, but as you got older you began to feel more awkward and alone? This continued up until you joined the furry fandom would you say? What was your academic progress like?

Wolfenstein:That’s a decent description. Yes. I really wish I could put into words the feelings I had as a preteen and even into the past few years.

My academic progress. ( I assume this means my schooling lol)I had a tough time in lower grades like 1-6. But as I got older my grades went from c-d to A and A- I went to a technology school and graduated with licenses. I wanted to go to collage but I was told I HA a Breyer shot not going [I had a better shot not going] and hoping [joining] in the work force. So here I am

Me:And what do you work as? How much interaction do you have with other furries in person, such as at conventions?

Wolfenstein:I’m a mid level factory worker! It’s shit. I hate it everyday. I used to work for the [removed]. Out in the woods. Rain or shine. That was my dream job. But it was only seasonal and I needed a year round job. I only interact with one other furry in person not that I don’t want to it’s I live In a very…. Rural area the towns are small and narrow minded. I’m Hornsby [horribly/terribly] lucky to have one furend [sic]. But I would love to go to a con. To be amongst my own for a few hours even.

Me:How do you think furries differ from the rest of society?

Wolfenstein:Generally. We are happier. We express ourselves easier we are usually more friendly and apt to care about people we hardly know, and we are more open sexually.

Me:In terms of sexuality, do you express your furry “fetish” through this with your wife? I know some furries have holes in their fursuits for sex in them, do you have anything similar?

Wolfenstein:Yes but once again I don’t have a fursuit. I do however have a Cerberus [NSFW] ( fetish-zone.com). It’s a sleeve like appendage that will lock your penis inside it via your balls. And it then turns into a k9 penis including knot. I really like using it. It feels and looks more normal to me than my human penis.

 

Model posing in Cerberus

She is also looking into buying a semi fursuit like bra panties tail and ears. She hopes this will entice me further

 

Part II to follow shortly!